loving the bum life

I haven't been going to work for the past three days. Why? I'm burned out...totally. I don't find meaning anymore in what I do. I do not take pride, even feel happy about coming to work and guess what, talk to people over the phone, most especially americans who just get irate on you, when in the first place I don't have anything to do with them and that I'm just doing my job.

I'm a journalism graduate, and right now, best thing that I want to do is to get, even a low-paying job and write. In the first place, that's what I have thoughtI'll be doing when I graduate.

I just had a job interview yesterday for a small magazine publication, and somehow, I impressed the h.r.

I still have another job interview, either on tuesday or wednesday, with the editorial assistant herself, whose position I will be fiiling in, if ever I get the job.

The h.r person offered me the position of editorial assistant.

It's one of the things I'm looking forward to because, it's going to be my first step in the writing career.

I'll be needing that for my CV someday, when I apply for a better company-publication or broadcast.

I just wish I get the job.

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As I've said, I've been at home for three days straight. Just getting rest, and making up stories of me not feeling well to my supervisor. (ooopps...sorry)

I feel bad that I have to make up some lies of me being sick, but really, it won't be helpful if I drag myself to work when I'm not really in the zone for work...

Pushing myself to do that would mean pushing mysel to insanity, anger management, and guess what...more angst.

Right now, I'm here, figuring out a way to let both ends meet if I end the high paying job.

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I'm thinking of developing a business with my money left. I'm thinking, it can somehow help me with my finances...well, mostly for the family once I decide to finally quit the job.

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If ever I get the writing stint, I'll be havinga meager salary of 7k-10k a month, a lot less than what I've been getting from the call center.

My mom told me, "OK lang naman, the question is, kaya mo bang mabuhay sa gannong salary?"

My answer. (HOnest answer, actually) "OO naman, kaya ko...ang iniisip ko kayo!"

I already told one of my sisters that I would like to quit the call center job, and she went on ranting with me: "wala na naman tayong kakainin!"

It somehow, kind of pissed me off. Because in the first place, I am trying to help the family, but don't go on with me and depend as if it's my sole responsibility to keep you living!

I mean, where's the gratitude?

Anyway, just some rants.

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By tomorrow morning, or rather, later in the eveing, I need to go to work early so that I won't have troubles of coming to work for my 4am shift tomorrow. I'll be sleeping in he office lounge.

And, tomorrow, I need to face the world once again.